3 Signs You're Erotomaniac

A victim of an erotomaniac person (male or female) needs to recognize these signs and set boundaries to quickly escape from this love trap.

An erotomaniac person Affected by The illusion of being loved by another person. Every word, look, compliment, kindness emanating from them is perceived as a signal of love, just like in social networks. Issue: This love is baseless, imaginary, fanciful and certainly unrequited. In other words, she found a world where the other loved her. This personality disorder Their behavior greatly affects women who are not aware of it. “Although the desire may seem flattering at first, erotomaniac behavior can truly be Destroy the victim's life, Hence the importance of not inducing this imaginary love and Get out of this web quickly“, warns immediately Valérie Grumelin, psychologist.

1. The erotomaniac tends to present himself as a victim

The erotomaniac has a tendency to victimize himself, venting his personal problems widely Seek compassion from your interlocutor. She used to say things like “No one likes me”, “I don't meet good people”, “No one understands me”, “I have no luck in my life”. .. as it may seem. affective bias, in erotomania, with the difference that the two subjects are not in a romantic relationship. “An erotomaniac is a person who has never been in love, or at least “bad love”. She doesn't get enough appreciation, care or good news about herself. So there was considerable sensory deprivation. This defect will affect his life. So, the day she meets someone who gives her a smile, a look, a kindness, a compliment, a declaration of love.“, describes Valérie Grumelin. She will feel unique, exceptional and loved. Everything in his thought system revolves around love. Public figures, doctors, psychologists, shopkeepers, social workers.

2. Erotomaniac over-penetration

From the moment it gets into her head that the other person is in love, the erotomaniac is locked into a system of values ​​that she refuses to question. she not distant, Always finds excuses to see his “target”, exposes himself more and more, inflates the news, interviews, becomes careless or immodest. For example, she may wait for the person outside the workplace, outside their home if she knows where they live, call them several times a day, and return frequently to a store or medical office if the “target” is a businessman or doctor. In short, she “requested”.

After 2-3 inappropriate contacts, you should be cautious.

At first, the “target” person may feel flattered or confused, and may not even notice that they are dating an erotomaniac. She does not know that her words or actions are being misunderstood By Erotomaniac. “This is normal because when you're at the beginning of a social interaction, you don't know the value of the other person and how good or bad you feel about yourself. You can't tell that the problem is serious. Then, as the interaction progresses, the target may feel uncomfortable and May begin to feel a pattern of oppression or Torture. This “unhealthy” game can last for months or even years. In fact, we can say that both the erotomaniac and his target are victims of this imaginary love.

So, to avoid triggering this one-sided relationship, it is We need to quickly set boundaries So don't prolong the disappointment. After 2-3 inappropriate contacts, you should be cautious. We must not leave room for the slightest doubt, the slightest ambiguity. You need to explain to her that you are nice to everyone and she doesn't get any special preference.” For example, say, “I am with you as I am with others.”“,”I'm not flirting with you“,”I'm sorry you misunderstood my intention“. Above all, avoid cutting off all contact without first explaining your position to him.

3. An erotomaniac may be aggressive

Once she realizes that love is not reciprocated, the erotomaniac can fall from a great height and go into a state of anger, developing feelings of failure and disappointment. According to Valerie Crummel, “Some erotomaniacs are so angry that they are ready to take revenge, while others change An object of deep hatred or the cause of all his misfortunes. Fortunately, in most cases, after a while, the erotomaniac falls off his cloud, but eventually learns of his misinterpretation. To achieve this, she may need to consult a health professional (psychologist, etc.) to help her regain her self-esteem. But sometimes, especially if it lasts for a long time, it can lead to depression, excessive anger or aggressive behavior.“: serious harassment, suicidal threats or, very exceptionally, irreparable acts.

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