Bone Daddy Dawn of the Dead Remake Review!

Posted by:

Bone Daddy has written an outstanding review of Dawn of the Dead, and here it is in detail.

The Remake of Dawn
Grade:
As a flick: (
As Compared to the Original: D

"It could have been so much better" Guy across the isle from me.

At the beginning there is promise that this is going to be a good flick. The scenes in the neighborhood made me wonder if I'm going to have some disturbing dreams later that night. It hit home how fragile our lives are and how fast the shizzle hit the fan when the world decides to rip itself apart. I found myself wondering how would I react if something happened to my own family, and could I handle if anything happened to my wife or daughter.

On top of that there is the feeling of hopelessness with this new zombie. They're faster than when they were alive- If you see it, there is no way the overweight zombie could have run that fast when she was alive- and pretty strong. One cracks a car window with one punch. With a single will, to rip you apart as fast as possible using as many of them as they can. These can't be avoided, there's no circumventing these things, no characterization that these things were human other than in form and appearance... it's in your face shapeless hostility.
Gone are the mindless wandering shambling creatures that you have some chance against. If there is any social commentary to be delved from these new ones, it may be compared to terrorists... but that may be a stretching it.
Do I like the new ones? No. Call it nostalgia or what you will, but why do you want your audience to feel that it is a hopeless situation? Right away you take away emotional involvement in the film because they have already detatched themselves when they know these people are so much meat for the grinder.

When they get to the Mall... any disturbing qualities fall apart. You don't see exactly how they they get in, they don't "fight" for the mall, or clean it out, you don't even see them fortify it. These things can crack safety glass but can't get through glass doors? There's a parking garage attatched and they can't get through there? Where is this garage on the wide shots of the outside?

You're starting to get the picture... the make-up is good but the plot is weak... very weak... It would be envious of old men without viagra. Hell even a lady with a walker can kick the crap out of it.

Make-up and Visuals:
The MPAA wouldn't let Savini strut, but allow this gore'o'rama to pass? There are head shots, ripped out jugulars, mallets through the brain, crow bars to the eyes, more head shots with splatter, (oh the splatter), exploding propane tanks...YAY! Mayhem!... and the lovely use of chainsaws, not original but... I like chainsaws.
The zombies were gored out and realistic enough..top notch, Real Horror Show.. only if the camera would have held still so we could get a really good look at them!
Camera Work sucked... were they trying to cause nausea using the Blair technique? It was good and steady, till the zombies showed up. Then is just got hazy and fast. Hazy can be good... see Black Hawk Down... but it can be bad when there is no logic to it... see Blair Witch Project or 28 Days Later.

The characters:
Polly and Rhames are the glue of this entire thing, really the only ones you get to have any emotional attatchment for... more for Rhames because Polly almost moves into the realm of the supporting characters.
Out of the supporting characters: Andy was the best, maybe because he was stuck on the roof of the Gun Shop a block away. Not even in the Mall... but a nice shot with a rifle.
The rest of the cast are basically just Cannon Fodder.
At one point they throw in more survivors via a truck; after that I was like "where the heck did she come from?" You don't see these people get out of the truck in any way to see their faces... all of a sudden they're just there, and little else afterward.
And that is the whole problem with this thing... the plot pulls things out of thin air with no explanations and then DOES NOTHING WITH IT except kill it. Wait it's KENNY! Now that would have been nice... Oh no, they've killed Kenny!! Because they're bastiches...

My biggest gripe: SPOILER?

They use a dog from the parking garage to deliver food to Andy at the Gun Shop. The zombies won't attack the dog,..(really now?)... but follow it through the ...(sigh)... doggie door in the Gun Shop. "Emotionally Destroyed" girl gets the truck she came in... to save the dog. Andy thus gets bit, turns, and the girl is trapped in a closet. The others just have to rescue the girl, and get some weapons... using the... (groan)... sewers and coming out of the manhole... (make the hurting stop)... right in front of the Gun Shop.

Am I the only one to think that this is an offence to my intelligence and that the writers need to be dragged out into the streets and have this film violently shoved up thier rectum as a warning to others?

And I'm not even going to go into the ending... it could have been so much better... the entire thing could have been so much better.