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December 20th, 2014

Chromeskull: Laid To Rest 2 Movie Review

Chromeskull: Laid To Rest 2 Movie ReviewNever again- that’s all I have to say for anyone who asks me from here on out what I think of the LAID TO REST series or if I will want to check out another sequel. That’s not to say I won’t check it out (curiosity always gets the best of me), but I won’t be excited and I will only do so if I have spare time and nothing better to watch. I should have learned my lesson after how much I hated the first movie- but I dug the look of the killer so much that I had to give it a fair shake. The sad truth is that this film fails even more than the first by setting up interesting ideas and not just shoots itself in the foot on the follow through it takes a rocket launcher and blows the foot clean off- but the effects were great.

Things pick up right at the end of the events from the first movie. The surviving victims take off in search of safety right before a mysterious team moves in to clean up the mess Chromeskull has left. This team seems to be people who all work WITH Chromeskull and one of them is an agent- I think- who wants to take over Chromeskull’s “job.” From there it’s a hideous combination of stupid plot devices that barely make any sense full off terrible characters and awesome gore filled kills.

The gore effects are the ONLY thing worth watching in these movies. I say that as a person who no longer wants to watch anymore sequels they put out. If they can’t figure out a way to make these movies more enjoyable beyond cool kills then this a one trick pony that just needs to be put down.

The acting is as amateur as ever and that’s putting it mildly. If I had to accurately describe it, it’s kind of like watching kids when they are playing house, hospital or army and replace the kids with middle aged adults. The caliber of acting here is right on the level of your average porn movie or sci fi original title minus the hardcore sex or lines like “damn you Sharktopus!” Brian Austin Green is painfully bad- almost like he’s practiced spouting bad guy dialogue to himself in the mirror or with Barbie and Ken dolls in his spare time. He’s constantly barking orders with zero inflection or with a snarky tone that oozes “pretty boy trying to play badass” and it is unintentionally hilarious. Here’s an actual line of dialogue to give you a hint at what you’re in for- Green looks around for a second and pushes a female victim into an open casket and says “sit here, it’s a box seat…you’ll like that.” It just gets worse and worse to the point you are waiting for Chromeskull to lay waste to everyone they introduce.

Speaking of Chromeskull, he’s still the only decent thing about the series. I made a list a while back featuring my picks for best modern slashers and was kind enough to include the killer despite how much I hated the film he is featured in. I have to say I stick by my choice buy only because of his look, weapon of choice and the shoulder strapped camera. That said they introduce more back-story here that nearly ruins the entire gimmick of Chromeskull. I was much more intrigued when it was just one guy possibly a mortician collecting the victims and recording the kills. Now it seems there is some odd company behind the whole thing and he’s got an assistant and a “cleaner” who is as insubordinate as they come- beyond that the company seems pretty empty after the first scene of them cleaning up the crime scene from the first film.

Love horror? Bored? Then rent any number of the classic slasher films over again because there is no reason to waste any more time on this series. LAID TO REST should have done just that after the first film and after LAID TO REST 2 I refuse to believe there will ever be demand for a third installment- even though it’s open for one. I would see no problem in dressing as Chromeskull on Halloween because the getup is pretty cool, except the shame comes in admitting you’ve actually seen the film. If LAID TO REST 2 was just a setup to put a final nail in Brian Austin Green’s acting career then I take back everything I said and the film is now genius.




2 Comments


  1. Soysauceballs

    Me so horny


  2. Soysauceballs

    My Dick Has Genital Warts



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